Choices we make everyday...like which color nail polish shall I use?

Friday, October 21, 2011

Well, let me just start off by saying... I never really know what I am saying! But I'm just going to say it anyway. Some people believe that honesty and your true self should always be kept behind closed doors, and better yet how about all those dirty little secrets we all have but like to act like we don't? Well some people say just sweep it under the rug? Then others believe that they always know exactly how everyone should act at all times, except for themselves.

Well I say, forget about all those people. Who makes up all these silly rules anyhow? As for me, yeah I tend to go with my heart and make blog posts about lice. What in the world was I thinking? Man, I laughed at myself afterwards and was about to delete my post a couple of times, but for some odd reason I was stopped. Or maybe it was just the fact that my sis-in-law Bj made a comment and it always makes me happy to see her anywhere in my life. Cause I just love that girl. But okay just for this story's sake lets just say another source kept me from erasing the embarrassing blog I made.

"Eh, who cares...just leave it." I finally told myself. I tend to get myself in trouble a lot with those words, but again... I am not trying to impress anyone, except my husband and trust me I already have plenty of his attention! Uh yeah... he basically can't get enough of me...being sarcastic now, but a little bit serious too. *wink*

So, back to my blabbing. I wrote the post and left it. Didn't know why until last night...

Oh man... let me just say there is a reason why Kids have to look like this...

Angels...

Too cute for words...

I mean,... come on! Look at that face!

Yeah and there's a reason why...

It's for times when you have to look at this face...

"Uh-oh!"

"Ohhhh no... now what did you do?" are the words that go through my head many times a day, but this time those words turned from dismay to panic as I walked up the stairs to an eerily familiar smell.

"Why does it smell like nail polish!!!" I shrieked as I was now bolting up the flight of stairs in two leaps.

And there it was... my brand new, hard earned long long hours of sweat blood and tears to purchase my wonderful, lovely, deep dark chocolate, sumptuous, comfortable, silky, chenille sectional sofa couch

now with...

bright pink nail polish!

And right then I had a choice...

My silly little blog wasn't for anyone else's benefit but that of my own.

As my heart sank and my eyes filled with angry tears... I yelled for my two year old to come see what she had done.

But as I waited for her to emerge the words I had written with my own hands kept coming to my mind over and over... "Stop and breathe." "You're only human (including your own kids)." "It's only a couch not a life." "I can't believe I burned my mom's couch...what had I done!"

I kept seeing flashes of my past experience the last week and what I had learned.

Again... I had a choice.

MaeLee decided on hot pink as her intuitive choice for the perfect nail color.

As for me, I decided to grab ahold and wrestle down my burning anger for a moment long enough to show her her mistake and set her, not throw her or harm her, but set her with all calmness I could muster on her bed and tell her to stay on her bed for her punishment. She cried because if you know MaeLee then you know staying put on her bed is THE worst punishment, ever.

I knew I had done the right thing, but not until after a good 15 minutes and I had come back to my senses even though I scrubbed and scrubbed with Rocky at my side frantically trying everything we could to get it out.

And after 15 minutes of calming myself and Rocky's self down we figured okay,
MaeLee has cried on her bed and watched me clean the couch long enough. Rocky took her in his arms, hugged her and went downstairs for some daddy daughter time. Which ended up being cookies and milk.

I didn't react with my emotions on her. I didn't take all my pain and frustration out on my baby who is learning. Parenting Rocky and I are finding out is very difficult. We have decided upon many occasions that we are NOT going to be "spanking" parents. We decided to be proactive in not lashing out with hurtful "put-down" words, but try to give good direction and firm positive correction when needed.

It's very hard to do this, and we are not perfect by any means. But, that's why I wrote my silly blog unknowing the reason for it. Just trusting that small quiet voice every time I thought "This is dumb... why am I saying these things?" And trusting that voice every time it repeated "Just trust me... keep writing."

So my couch yes... is broken in and now officially "the Tano family couch". The pink polish isn't quite out, but it looks like someone took a good effort to it.

As for MaeLee she went happily to bed with kisses, hugs, and cookies and milk in her tummy.

As for Rocky and I well we took some time out to enjoy the fact that we love our kids and we love our marriage. We laughed and cuddled all night long watching our favorite shows.

As for the couch cover it spend the night soaking in the sink.

In the end,... she's our baby girl.

Okay in her defense she did ask several times that day for me to paint her nails!

In the end she found a way to climb up to the polish and get the job done herself.

We love you MaeLee.